Ministry, my heart and soul, is calling me back, truly it is a God thing. It is God calling me to himself. Making me realize I am truly blessed. Making me realize I am called. Confirming that calling, helping me to realize it is time to take yet another step of faith. Yes, last year in March I took the first GIANT step when I resigned from my position as youth & children’s minister at my church to commit to Beauty by Design Ministries full time.

The thing is I know this is what I was suppose to do but over the past year I still haven’t been 100 percent confident in that. I have opted to use other means to make money because of my own insecurities, which I now after attending She Speaks and becoming very convicted believe that I have only limited God by doing this.

I lacked the confidence to write articles and devotions and submit them to Christian publications for print publishing though I in October began to write for others as a ghostwriter and got paid weekly. To me this has been taking the easy way out of following God in faith. It paid the bills, but it wasn’t truly what I set out to do. I have done quite a few speaking engagements but because of fear, feelings of guilt about promoting myself, and lack of confidence I don’t believe I have done what I could have.

After She Speaks I realize I have been wrong. This ministry (Beauty by Design Ministries) isn’t mine, it’s God’s and it is all about Him. By promoting it, and speaking to teen and tween girls, and writing articles and devotions to them, is after all promoting God and what He has for their lives. I am going to refocus on that and I am going to recommit myself to HIM and HIS WILL for Beauty by Design Ministries. I am going to invest MUCH more of my time and energy into it, as well as invest in it financially, trusting Him to not only provide for the ministry but also my family, rather than trying to do it on my own as I have for months now.

I am going to take another giant step of faith by stepping back from some of the ghostwriting I’ve been doing, not adding anymore at this time on top of my current clients, not pursuing anymore “sideline” projects as I have in the past few months doing nearly ANYTHING LEGAL to make money ok not really, but I have done some VA type jobs, Wordpress installs and other things just because I thought I needed the money. It’s been too much about money and not enough about ministry.

It has been way too much of my agenda and as the theme of She Speaks said “I want to move my agenda aside in favor of God’s will”. So, I am clearing the right of way Lord, show me your path!

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I am still pinching myself because after this past weekend I realize dreams really can come true.  God not only confirmed in me but once again I felt him calling me to a higher purpose, a purpose only he can establish and a plan only he can orchestrate.  You see in the months before I signed up to attend She Speaks I began conversing with Leann Rice, Executive Director of Proverbs 31, and She Speaks Conference Coordinator, as well as Kristen Sigmon and Samantha Reed who work with The Next Generation, Proverbs 31’s teen division about becoming a part of the work of this division of Proverbs 31 Ministries.  After all teens are my heart.

Before coming to the conference these ladies said that we’d get together while I was there to talk about the possibility of my becoming involved with the Next Generation.  As a part of this I began back several months ago submitting devotions to them for publication on their blog for teens, A Radical Revolution.  I have had a couple of these devotions show up there already.

So, as soon as I arrived at the conference, I met Leann, mind you for the purpose of actually being able to stay there overnight as the hotel apparently thought I was coming in on Friday rather than Thursday, but sweet Kristen, willingly gave my husband & I her room, this only begins to tell you what kind of people these ladies are.

Leann assured me then and there we’d meet this weekend, but it might not be that night since her schedule had her working late.  I have to admit some doubts crept in as I began to worry, “do they really want to talk with me?”  But, at lunch on Saturday I sat pinching myself as I had lunch with Leann, Kristen and Samantha and was asked to share about the ministry God allows me to do with teen girls, my calling, my testimony and my desire to work with them.  It was an awesome few moments, one of the highlights of my weekend.  As I stared into the eyes of Samantha and Kristen as they obviously felt my same passion for youth, specifically teen girls I felt an instant connection.  As I shared with them, I had seen the Next Generation girls, those teen girls who attended the conference walking around and felt a strong urge to “follow them” as I have such a passion for sharing with and ministering to teens.

Not only did Kristen, Samantha and I have an instant connection, but I was also told by Shari and the other members of my speaker evalution group that they could see my passion for teens as I spoke.  Confirmation yet again, and I am sooo excited that Kristen, Samantha, Leann and I agreed to stay in touch as God’s plans for the Next Generation grow and come into being I will continue to be a part.  I can only imagine what God has in store, as just being able to be a part of this in any small way is a fullfilment of the dreams God has planted in me.  One thing is for sure, I will be back at She Speaks next year and I hope to be able to be a part of The Next Generation track there in some way.

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She Speaks, was a conference for Christian Writers, Speakers and Bloggers, oh my! The worst part, feeling torn between all three. I have for a long time called myself a Christian speaker, for a shorter time however I have began to dub myself a Christian writer and blogger. Though, I have had a love for writing a long time and been a faithful blogger as well, I just didn’t realize that I really WAS ONE! Does that even make sense? But now, looking back on the conference I realize, I am …. really… ALL 3. Which is awesome, but challenging at the same time.

As I chose for the conference to go as a speaker, I chose to take the Speaker’s Track and mostly take speaker related workshops with a few exceptions here were my choices: Blogging: What Works and What Doesn’t, The Power of a Story, Marketing for More Bookings, Teaching By The Book and Balancing Marriage & Ministry.

I feel like God placed me in each of those specifically for a reason. The blogging one helped me, in addition to Friday’s blogging reception to connect with those ladies online who I only knew by face and words. It was amazing to meet someone whose blog you’ve read and pictures you’ve seen 1000 times. I told my husband it felt so weird because I felt like I knew them already in “real life” though I really did not, but now can say that I do.

The other workshops were amazing, I learned too much to even possibly post. And, in addition I participated in Shari Braendel’s Speaker Evaluation Group which was the most nerve racking of all the things I did this weekend. You see, I’ve been a “speaker” for 3 whole years. I have had no shortage of speaking opportunities, no matter how small to me, I felt I was prepared. So, why did I suddenly become nervous when I strangely never got nervous before about speaking?

Well, normally the 11 other ladies in the room aren’t “evaluating” me. I think that was the key. However, these sweet sisters, were very honest, yet critical, but just what I needed and Sunday afternoon I walked away with an even greater confirmation that I am a “Christian speaker”. I can do this with God’s Grace!!! Ironically one of the themes of the weekend was “grace, grace, grace”, the other, “Setting my agenda aside, for God’s Will to be done.” Something I want, now, more than ever, “for God’s will to be done in my life”.

I was blown away when Shari shared with me during my speaker evaluation session that I should write my “speech” into an article and submit it for publication in a Christian teen magazine. This confirming that I am a “Christian writer”.

And, as I sit her “blogging” this morning, I know, I am a “Christian blogger”. So, I guess God has only confirmed in me what I thought I knew, but now know for sure! Amazing, and as I said yesterday I am truly BLESSED!

Though I know for many of my readers it seems like I am going on on and on….there is more… so stay tuned.

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I know the answer to this question before I even ask it, “Can I avoid him?” Who is him you ask? Well, Satan, Lucifer, the Devil, the Thief, whatever term you want to use, he comes only to kill, steal and destroy. However, somehow I seem lately to be avoiding him, which can only mean one thing….he’s still lurking. He’s still out there plotting to destroy me. Why do I say that you ask? Well, because that’s what he does and apparently he is trying desperately to do so.

Lysa T. shared in her blog this week that he is attacking the ladies of Proverbs 31 Ministries as they are preparing for She Speaks next week, and now I hear or read rather over on Lisa B’s blog, SImply His, that he is attacking the attendees as well. I share with her in her comments he hasn’t reached me yet. I am at peace. As you may have read earlier in the week I took over VBS this past week at my church, just two weeks shy of its dates. And though I used to stress about being in charge of VBS I was at peace. I am at peace. The same has been true so far with She Speaks. I have been at peace. I have been excited, ecstatic, ready! I still am. But, I am also now guarded. Guarding myself against SATAN, because since I haven’t felt him yet, it can only mean one thing, he’s still lurking. So, ladies. I”d love your prayers.

Here’s what I want for myself, and for all the ladies of Proverbs 31 and the attendees that like me are preparing to attend She Speaks next week. For those of you who are attending we must prepare for battle. We must put on the “full armor of God”. I am getting ready. I hope you are too. Remember the words written in Ephesians,

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.”

Ephesians 6:10-20

I am going to focus on these verses the next few days. This will be my preparation to battle Satan, if he does try to rear his ugly head!

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It’s true, He keeps getting me here, to the point I am now. God continually moves in our lives to get us to the point where we stand today. It is hard to believe that there are people out there who do not believe in his divine power. I see divine inspiration and divine appointments in my daily life. They are too numerous to count, to amazing too miss. But, yet, some people go throughout life, day after day missing them all. Sad, but true.

I thought I’d continue “my story”. As I realized after copying and pasting the testimony I had written last July to the blog yesterday as part of telling my “testimony” that there was more to the story. My testimony is ever going, ever growing, never ending. Each day God adds more to it. Isn’t that awesome?

So, where I left off yesterday in the testimony was in July 2007 at the point I was giving the testimony to a group of ladies at my mother-in-law’s church. I was sharing with them that God was blessing my ministry efforts and that I was blessed to be able to do ministry and stay home with my children. I was content.

Of course, like most folks, I didn’t remain content. I had been home since March 2007, when my baby girl was born and thing had gone pretty smoothly for the time being, that is until the money began to dwindle. I was accustomed to a paycheck every month without fail from my youth-children’s ministry position, and that pay check was gone.

Being the one who takes care of the money in our family I began to stress. I crunched numbers, pinched pennies, made lists, tried to save and scrimp but the money was just not there and I was stressing. This was sometime towards the beginning of fall just as my son was starting preschool. Well, not being one to just “give up” i prayed and I searched online and everywhere for ideas.

I thought about getting a part time job, even checked into waitressing, something I had never done, but thought hey I can do it. Obviously, this wasn’t meant to be because it never came to fruition. In fact, that too was in God’s divine plan as it wasn’t long until I found out I was expecting baby #3. I know there are probably people who do it every single day, but waitressing pregnant isn’t something I’d choose to want to experience.

So, as I said God had other plans anyway. In October, I receive a phone call from a fellow Work at Home Mom. She had heard my desperate plea online for finding something to do to make extra money and she was familiar with me. She said she had read some of my articles and knew I could write. She wanted to hire me to write some articles for her, and agreed to pay me. So, of course, I agreed to write. I began the very next few days, then, decided hey, this is something I could definitely do to make money. Writing that is. So I set up a website, A Writer for HIre, and began pursing clients. God placed them one by one in my lap.

Then, I set some income goals and watched as month after month those goals were blown out of the water. In addition the bookings for Beauty by Design speaking opportunities kept a coming. I was doing both things that I had always wanted to do, speaking AND writing. It felt too good to be true, but apparently for once it is not, because today I am still doing both.

This year, in 2008, to date I have spoken 7 times already. My goal each year since I began this ministry has been to do 12 events per year. At this rate I should accomplish that, this year. Last year, in 2007, I got really close doing 11 events. Each a huge blessing and stepping stone to the next thing God had in store.

In February, I stumbled upon Proverbs 31 Ministries and began communicating with those ladies, signing up for the She Speaks conference and realizing what a God thing it was to begin talking with them. I am now writing devotions for them and have hopes for becoming more involved in their ministry.

I know there is probably more I could share as through the past few months I feel I have received many divine appointments and opportunities. I see God moving in miraculous ways daily in my life, and for that I am grateful. I can’t wait to see what He has in store.

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If you’ve read my blog lately or for any length of time you’ll see I”m normally rather long-winded. I am a chatty Cathy as one might call it and I do love to talk. In just 8 days now I am going to She Speaks in Charlotte, NC a speaker and writer’s conference put on by Proverbs 31 Ministries. I am super excited!

One of the things we have to do in preparation for the conference is to create a 3 minute speech to introduce ourselves, tell our story or testimony to the group we are in, if you signed up for a speaker’s group that is. I, of course, did and I’m looking so forward to the feedback. I have been doing public speaking now for quite some time. I have been speaking in churches and at clubs and other organizations as a part of my ministry to girls, Beauty by Design Ministries, since I founded it in January 2005. But I have NEVER, yes you read that right, NEVER, been to a speaker’s conference, had any training, other than speech class in college and the school of hard knocks called life and teaching youth and children Sunday School and etc. This I often I prepared for more than once per week for 5 years, I taught Sunday School, Wednesday night Bible studies and more a part of my position as youth /children’s minister.  Needless to say, I am not one of those ladies who this is my first time, so I don’t have the right to be trembling in my shoes.

In fact, I am not nervous, I am one of the few strange people in the world who does not have the fear of public speaking. This is even more odd because I was such a shy child! My fear does not lie in the arena of public speaking. In fact, I am just the opposite and energized by it. My adrenaline is flowing when I am up in front of others speaking, especially if it is an opportunity to speak about something I am passionate about. So, my dilemma is a little different. My dilemma is “How the heck do I introduce myself and tell my story or testimony in ONLY 3 minutes?” Can’t they give a girl 5?

So, any tips or advice on “shortening” my speech? Any thoughts on what you’d want to hear about me if you were in a group of ladies who are meeting me for the first time?

I am excited though and look forward to some “constructive” criticism as I have NEVER been evaluated and know that this can only help me to grow!

Leave me your thoughts folks!

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I’m writing this post for all you ladies who are hopping over from Lysa Terkeurst’s blog about She Speaks. Yes, I’ll be there. Even though I will be 36 weeks pregnant, read more about why this is so important to me here and why I believe this is a God thing here.

I want to say thanks to those of you who did come over from Lysa’s blog for coming and that I can’t wait to “meet” you. I am in awe that there will be 500 ladies there. Did I mention I’m bringing my husband? We celebrate 8 years together on June 17 and come to She Speaks later that week. It will be out “time away” just before baby #3 is born. AHHH!!! I hope I don’t loose him in all those women.

So, ladies, I LOVE comments so be sure to leave me one. If you’ve attended She Speaks before give me your best advice on getting the most out of it. If you have never attended before tell me briefly why you are attending. I would love to know everyone’s reasons.

The other day I set some goals for She Speaks because well I’m just a goal setter. I wouldn’t be me without a PLAN and a GOAL. So here are my goals for She Speaks.

My Goals for She Speaks

• I want to get a clearer vision of where I am going with my ministry.
• I want to learn how to market myself better.
• I want to decide if I am going to pursue becoming a published author.

If you have goals why not post them on your blog and then post the link in my comments and I’ll come over and read them and root you on. I love to be an encouragement to others. Again, I can’t wait to “Meet” you all at She Speaks. I fly out 3 weeks from today! WHOO HOO!!!

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Yes, that’s right, God still works miracles in our lives, even if they are small ones.  Read more about the miracles God worked in my life the last couple of days here.

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