We Learn the Hard Way
by Alyssa Avant on February 14, 2010
in My Marriage
Welcome back!
Is it just me, or do we sometimes have to learn, the hard way? I know that I spend a lot of time on the computer. As most of you know I work online and therefore spend a great deal of time on the computer. In addition, I have accumulated a good many friends online that I “socialize” with throughout the day on Twitter. For me, it’s second nature and I don’t think much about it, or at least I didn’t until last night.
We spent the night before Valentine’s Day with friends, 4 other couples in fact that we like to get together with often, friends from church who we admire and respect. One of them is the youth and children’s director at our church, he was going to be planning a Valentine’s banquet for our church that was held tonight and was going to be doing his version of the Newlywed Game at the banquet, so last night, he wanted to “practice” on us. He did and the game was a ton of fun. Unfortunately for me, it was also very “telling”. One of the questions posed to the husband’s was, “what one habit does your wife have that you cannot stand.” My husband had written down his answer and I then had to “guess” what it was. As much as I hate to admit it, I knew the answer right away. He hates that I stay on the computer so much. Of course, I was dead on. I practically hung my head in shame. The truth, as we all know, “hurts”.
This is something I knew but was not taking to heart. Mind you I will now. I told him this morning I was making a new rule for myself. I won’t be on the computer when he is home unless it is absolutely necessary for work. He was so sweet to say, “I didn’t mean you couldn’t be on it at all.” But, nevertheless I realize I must set limits.
I tweeted about this earlier today and several ladies agreed that their husbands would say the same thing. Would yours? Maybe we can hold each other accountable.
I don’t know what my husband would write down, there are a couple other things that he might actually hate more, but I know that being on the computer a lot would be at the top of the list and one of the three he was choosing from. But does it really have to be number one for me to change it? Of course, that’s rhetorical. You don’t really have to answer that. =\
[Reply]
Hey there–
Hubby and I had a similar discussion not once but twice in the last couple of weeks. He hates it when he comes home from work and I’m on the computer. So….I am making an effort to do most of my stuff before he gets home, if at all possible. My immediate reaction was to roll my eyes and get defensive (mature, huh?) but I know he is right, so I’m working on it. The computer does have a way of sucking you in and before you know it you have been online 2 hours when you logged in just to check your email! I also feel pressure to keep up with everyone on Twitter/FB, etc. *sigh* So silly when you really think about it…but one things for sure…my hubby and family are more important so I am working on scheduling “computer/writing time” into my day and leaving it at that.
(((HUGS)))
Christy
@aidenscross (twitter)
Christy Cross´s last blog ..SandBaggers Women’s Golf Shoes- Product Review
[Reply]
My hubs might have this on this list. Might. You see, he’s on his more than I’m on mine, so maybe not?
I do try very hard not to be on my computer if he’s off his. He works so much, even after hours, at home, that finding time to spend together is difficult.
Erica Mueller´s last blog ..Blissful Alarm {NOT}
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Dear Alyssa,
I think that your blog might have actually been THE first one that I followed, before I even started blogging.
I had lost contact with you, until last week, when a mutual blogging friend of ours mentioned hurting for you, when you posted I’m Not Perfect.
I am on the computer a lot, when I’m home, blogging, trying to become a writer, and doing my teacher work, too. Sometimes it takes a lot of the Saturday, like today. I need to get off and be with my husband. Thank you for all of your posts.
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